“Do not prepare the path for the child. Prepare the child for the path.” – Native American Proverb
Does your child struggle to make decisions, avoid challenges, or give up easily?
Many parents worry when they see their child hesitant to act, afraid of failure, or stuck in a cycle of inaction. The truth is, kids get stuck for a few key reasons, and often, without realizing it, parents play a role in holding them back.
If you’re wondering, “Why is my child stuck?”, here’s what might be happening— and more importantly, how to help.
1. Parents Are Solving Problems Instead of Letting Kids Struggle
It’s natural to want to protect your child from frustration, but when parents jump in too quickly, kids don’t develop the problem-solving skills they need. Without small challenges, they won’t learn how to handle bigger ones later in life. I often see this even between other kids. As soon as someone sees another struggle, they automatically want to swoop in and save the day. Yet, how does this help someone? What would they do when no one is around? This is why it is important to keep spaces open for struggle and problem solving.
What Can You Do?
✅ Give them time to figure things out before stepping in.✅ Ask open-ended questions instead of giving immediate solutions.✅ Let them experience small failures to develop problem-solving skills.
2. Fear of Failure or Rejection is Holding Them Back
This has been a big theme with many of my 20' somethings clients. If your child avoids trying new things, has problems making friends or avoids taking things seriously, fear of failure might be the root cause. They worry about looking silly, making mistakes, or being judged—so they avoid situations where they could fail.
How to Help Your Child Overcome Fear of Failure
⭐ Normalize failure as a learning tool. Share your own setbacks and how you recovered.⭐ Praise effort and persistence, not just success.⭐ Encourage them to take small risks to build resilience.
3. They’re Not on a “Typical” Timeline—And That’s Okay
Some children take longer to develop confidence, independence, or social skills. Comparing them to others only adds pressure and discouragement. As the saying goes, "comparison is the thief of joy". We all develop at different stages. If your child has ADHD, it is commonly believed that their social-emotional development can be at least 2 years behind other more "neurotypical" peers. When we set timelines and dates on when things MUST be achieved, we set ourselves up for disappointment. Some times it takes a little extra time to figure it out- and the message to your kid should be- THAT'S OK!
What Can You Do?
✔ Support them at their own pace. Growth isn’t linear for every child.✔ Celebrate small progress instead of focusing on where they “should” be.✔ Help them set realistic, achievable goals to build momentum.
Letting Go to Help Them Grow
If your child seems stuck, take a step back and allow them to struggle, problem-solve, and take small risks. Independence and resilience come with experience, not immediate solutions.
Need More Support?
At Special Connects, Justin specializes in helping kids build social skills, resilience, and confidence through structured life coaching sessions. If your child is struggling with independence, decision-making, or fear of failure, let me help.
📩 Schedule a free consultation today! Visit www.specialconnects.com
Comments