Permission to Pause – The Power of Rest Without Guilt
- Justin Lyons
- Aug 4
- 3 min read
Rest doesn’t require a retreat or spa day. It starts with small shifts
You Don’t Have to Earn Your Rest
Somewhere along the way, many of us began equating our value with our productivity. We started believing that unless we’ve checked everything off a list, responded to every email, and pushed past exhaustion, we haven’t earned the right to rest.
But here’s a truth I’ve seen time and again while supporting young adults: you don’t have to earn rest—you need it to grow.
Rest is not laziness. Rest is not weakness.
Rest is where your body, mind, and emotions catch up with all the effort you’ve been giving the world.
The Science Behind Rest
Let’s get this straight: rest isn’t just “nice to have.” It’s essential to your mental, emotional, and physical functioning.
Cognitive Recovery: According to research from the National Institutes of Health (NIH), mental rest improves memory, attention, and decision-making. It literally clears neural clutter.
Emotional Regulation: Rest allows your nervous system to shift from “fight or flight” (sympathetic nervous system) into “rest and digest” (parasympathetic nervous system), decreasing anxiety and improving emotional regulation.
Sleep and Mood: Chronic lack of rest (not just sleep) is linked to burnout, depression, and cognitive fatigue, particularly among young adults navigating high-stress transitions.
In short, rest is the reboot button your system needs.
Why Young Adults Struggle With Rest
For many emerging adults, the pressure to prove yourself can be overwhelming. Whether it's navigating college, career, relationships, or identity, there’s a constant internal (and external) push to keep achieving.
But here’s the danger:
We normalize burnout so much that we forget what it feels like to just be.
In coaching, I’ve worked with students, creatives, and young professionals who:
Feel guilty taking a break unless they’re “done” (which never happens)
Push through physical and mental exhaustion until they crash
Equate slowing down with falling behind
Let’s reframe that:
Slowing down is often the most strategic thing you can do.
Types of Rest (It’s Not Just About Sleep)
Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, author of Sacred Rest, identifies 7 types of rest we all need:
Physical Rest – Sleep, naps, stretching, restorative movement
Mental Rest – Time away from decision-making or screens
Emotional Rest – Safe spaces to be honest without performing
Social Rest – Breaks from draining interactions; time with energizing people
Sensory Rest – Reducing noise, light, and stimulation
Creative Rest – Time to be inspired without needing to produce
Spiritual Rest – Connecting to something greater than yourself (faith, nature, mindfulness)
Ask yourself: Which type of rest have I been deprioritizing?
Simple Ways to Reclaim Rest
1. Schedule It Like a Non-Negotiable
Don’t leave rest to “if there’s time.” Block it into your calendar like a meeting.
Try:
A 15-minute morning reset before opening your inbox
A no-screen hour before bed
One day a week without back-to-back commitments
2. Create a “Rest Menu”
We often scroll or zone out because we don’t know how to rest intentionally. Make a list of rest options that work for you—some quick, some deeper.
Examples:
10-minute nature walk
Journaling with music
Lying down with a weighted blanket
Coloring or creative play
Calling someone who energizes you
3. Practice Saying “No” Without Explaining
Rest requires boundaries. Learn to decline without guilt.
Sample script:“Thanks so much for asking. I can’t commit to that right now.”
You don’t owe anyone your depletion.
4. Reflect, Don’t Just Collapse
Sometimes we confuse numbing with resting. Binge-watching can be fine—but if it leaves you feeling more drained, check in.
Reflection Prompts:
What kind of rest would actually refuel me today?
What am I trying to escape by staying busy?
What does my body need right now?
A Note on Rest and Identity
If your self-worth is tangled up in being the “hard worker,” the “helper,” the “high achiever,” resting might feel like identity loss.
But here’s the reframe: You are not your hustle. You are a whole person deserving of care. And when you rest, you make room for the fullest version of you to rise.
You don’t need to crash to justify slowing down. You don’t have to wait until you’ve earned it. Rest is how you show up more fully—not how you escape.
Let rest be your reset. Let it be an act of self-leadership. Let it be the beginning of a rhythm that honors your humanity—not just your ambition.
What if your next breakthrough came after you unplugged?
At Special Connects, I help young adults build meaningful rhythms that blend rest, growth, and real-life responsibilities. Let’s co-create a life that doesn’t demand you burn out to succeed.
Ready to reclaim your energy and rewrite your habits?
Visit www.specialconnectsllc.com or email me at specialconnectsllc@gmail.com to explore how coaching can help you build a life that works with your energy—not against it.
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